Starting a Business: A Therapist's Mental Health Perspective

As I sit here writing my first blog on my own website, it occurred to me that I am the first person in my immediate (and perhaps extended?) family to start a business. Being an adult child of a very traditional Anglo-Saxon Southern family, I've had to unlearn and relearn what it means to be "successful". My parents aren't big believers in sick days, paid time off, mental health days, or medical leave. I watched my mom take only one vacation in her very long career as a manager of a construction company. My father had stomach cancer many years ago, and he took off only ONE sick day throughout the whole process. My parents aren't big believers in NOT being at work, regardless of whatever crisis they may be going through. A full disclaimer: I am not here to demonize anyone's parents including my own. Parents who raise their children do the best they can with what they have in front of them. Just the same, these traditional work ideals are concepts that I am having to reprogram in my brain... Along with an entire generation of Boomers of Baby Boomers (I just invented that one). People in my age range and younger are learning that we actually do not have to break our backs until we are 65, travel the world 7-14 days out of the year, and work nine hours a day behind a desk. We are collectively realizing that this "All-American" lifestyle leads to a higher suicide rate, increased risk of alcoholism, higher rates depression, and a shorter lifespan. The World Health Organization just released a statement saying that there were 745,000 deaths from stroke and heart disease in conjunction to working long hours, which according to them was a 29 percent increase since the year 2000. Mental Health America reports that depression contributed to a whopping $51 billion in absenteeism costs within the workforce. Dr. Kaliszewski's mind-blowing research featured on American Addictions Centers' website shows that the amount of alcohol and drug abuse among the middle-class workforce is actually more frequent than those living below the poverty line.... Let that one sink in! This is precisely why I started my business, New Wave Counseling, PLLC. Though one could argue that being independently contracted under another person's practice could be considered owning your own business, I strongly feel that when you are signed onto someone else's concept, you never fully design your own destiny. Instead of the captain of your own ship, therapists are really meant to be eager deck hands who fortunately (and unfortunately) aren't making their own executive decisions. As a business owner who just recently took a risky leap of opening my doors during a pandemic, I was scared to death at first of not succeeding. But even on my worst days, my quality of life is still much better than it was when I had bosses, paychecks, a clock to punch, and a monthly session log I had to submit for payroll. Before I opened my own mental health business, I bounced around a handful of practices as a contracted therapist, silently taking notes and "testing the temperature" at the practices under which I was employed. I decided the kind of culture and "vibe" (as the kids say nowadays) I wanted to emulate at my future practice. The longer I stayed employed at various practices in Dallas and Austin, the more data I collected. I wanted to soak up enough information so that the kind of practice I would open would be congruent to my vision. After many of my clients found themselves disheartened and discouraged after their employers they once trusted deeply had betrayed them at the onset of the pandemic, I found myself urging almost all of my clients to incorporate themselves. To start their own companies. To design their own destinies. And it occurred to me that I was hypocritical as I happened to be working for someone else during this time. I started my practice as a form of self-care, to create my own schedule, to be able to create my own brand, and to be paid what I am worth. This is absolutely not an "If I can do it, you can!" post by any means. I am fully aware of my privilege as a white cisgender male. And being a white-presenting gay man, I am aware that I am the most privileged minority in America. I am also aware that my ability to open a business, find an office space, and obtain clients has also been easier because of my privilege. And so I write this post as delicately and sensitively as possible. I can also say that nothing feels better than to be able to look at a business and say "That's mine, I run that!" Nothing feels better than not having to answer to a single person each day you go into your office. Nothing feels better than knowing that creating your business and marketing your brand has no one else's markings but your own. And nothing feels better than not being talked down to, verbally abused, sexually harrassed, or discriminated against by the very person who signs your paycheck. And so I close my very first blog post on MY website with this: Opening your own business can be an act of self-love, though it might seem petrifying at first. I am NOT dismissing the struggles that go into running a business (And with only six months of experience, I am by no means an expert!), but it is almost always better to run something that is yours versus being subservient to a mega-corporation that may very well exploit your talents.